Continuing in my series of busting myths about human sexuality, I would now like to deal with whether sex can be engaged in just for pleasure, without procreation. Many people seem to be of the belief that sex is only for reproduction, and that it is a sin to engage in sex for pleasure only. First, I would like to ask them where they found such a doctrine in the Bible, because it is not there! On the contrary, the Bible does endorse sex for pleasure and has dedicated a whole book to that, called Songs of Solomon.
Seeing that marriage is a reflection of our heavenly marriage to Christ, then sex must also have a spiritual counterpart in our spiritual relation with Christ. Going back to Matthew 19 (oh how I love this chapter!), Jesus gave a resounding affirmation of the sex act when He said:
"And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" (Matthew 19:4-6).
The sex act is described as the physical union between a man and woman, where two bodies join together and become "one flesh." No one should go and try to destroy this unity which God has ordained. Sex is a sacred, God-ordained act, "what therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder" (vs. 6).
So how is it that we now have people trying to tell us when a husband and wife should and should not have sex? Where did they get their doctrine that sex is only for procreation? Absolutely nothing in scripture speaks of this. As a matter of fact, the Bible encourages us to have sex as often as we want, and to take pleasure in it. The only restriction is when a woman is having her period, because of sanitary hazards, and also some time after childbirth so her body can recover (Leviticus 15:19; Leviticus 12:2-6). The following are scriptures that endorse sex for pleasure. Emphasis is supplied where appropriate.
"Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love" (Proverbs 5:18-19).
"How fair is thy love, my sister, my spouse! how much better is thy love than wine! and the smell of thine ointments than all spices!" (Song of Solomon 4:10).
His mouth is most sweet: yea, he is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, and this is my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem" (Song of Solomon 5:16).
"I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me. Come, my beloved, let us go forth into the field; let us lodge in the villages. Let us get up early to the vineyards; let us see if the vine flourish, whether the tender grape appear, and the pomegranates bud forth: there will I give thee my loves" (Song of Solomon 7:10-12).
"The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control" ( 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, NLT).
The scriptures speak for themselves. I have yet to find a scripture that tells me that sex purely for pleasure is wrong.